I admit...

that I get scared and frustrated at times. Frightened because I wondered what I am doing with my life, upset because I have done what I can and yet I am still in pain. Sometimes this is triggered by others' innocent inquiries, or my overactive brain.

I am not one to recount my past glories or setbacks. My poor memory helps especially with the latter. At times, I just wish I know what's coming up around the bend. I don't want my fortunes told, but an inkling would help.

School has been on my mind. I am afraid of not knowing what to do post school. All this anxiety has been manifesting in my dreams. Dreams of me losing a friend's baby (a minuscule one at that), competing on a popular dance show, and even having tons of white hair. Maybe not the dancing one, for I have always secretly wanted to do that.

Deep down inside, I know that all this is for naught, and that whatever I go for will be fine. For I have done this before, you see. The question is, am I ready for this leap of faith?