“Whoa! Say It Ain’t So!” by Chloe
Laura and Ben have been dating for the past couple months. One night, they were strolling hand-in-hand in the moonlight, when Ben came to an abrupt stop, and blurted out that he has been dying to tell her something.
“What could it be? The three little words (I heart U), or its not too shabby first cousin, the four little words (I really like U)? ” she pondered. Laura took a deep breath and began to listen to Ben with her fluttering heart in her hands.
Her premonition came true, sort of. Laura got the first cousin, with (o no!) its evil posse (o yes, the big BUT). After she regained her composure, she did what any Diva would do. Laura gave Ben what he deserved, and strutted out of his life forever.
Have you ever been in a similar situation, and wondered if you should stay or go? If so, check out the “Whoa! Say It Ain’t So” warning signs. If you recognize any of these signs below, its time to get your boots ready, and start walking. As always, feel free to save a copy in your trusty purse or phone.
Before reading the warning signs, let’s observe a moment of silence for the Divas that experienced these events.
P.S.: Dying to find out about Ben’s capital offense? Check out the numero uno warning sign.
‘Whoa! Say It Ain’t So’ Warning Signs
M Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda: After a romantic date, you thought everything was honky-dory. Then you hear, “You know you coulda looked so much better if you lose some weight.”
M State of Denial: After going out with your boo for the past couple months, the common perception is that you two are a couple. He, too, thinks that you guys are a couple, a couple of friends, that is.
M No Strings Attached: You and your honey reached the noveau significant other milestone. “Does this mean that we can’t have an open relationship?” he nervously inquires.
M THE Penny Pincher: On the first date, he took you to Sizzlers, and insisted that you two share today’s special, steak and baked potato. “Its perfect!” Since you are a vegetarian, you’ll take the spud. Since I eat anything, I’ll take the steak. It’s a win-win situation!” he coaxes.
M The Self-proclaimed Linch Pin: Mere seconds after the meet and greet, he began droning on about how he heroically saved his friend’s life by giving her a ride to the hospital. “Who knows what would have happened if I wasn’t there? That’s just who I am, you know, a giver. I help people out all the time. In fact, this other time, I gave my other friend a…”
M The Underground Girlfriend: Although you guys have been dating for the past two years, he excluded you from his inner circle because “It’s a cultural thing, you wouldn’t understand.”
M His Favorite Mistake: After dating for the past couple weeks, he went home to visit his family. Afterwards, he announces that being with you have made him realize that he is still in love with his ex. In fact, they got back together and are getting married.
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